its been close eough to one whole month since i last posted.
i have come to the conclusion that i am lazy.
there is so much i could be doing, so much i SHOULD be doing
but i have to settle for everything less of what is best for me.
i read over my other blogs. my first one made me feel sick.
i mean, i honestly felt all horrible inside. that type of sick.
there was so much doubt. i said i would shift her to number 2.
i could never do that. never.
up until extremely recently, i didnt believe that she cared for me the amount i care for her.
and now its been proved that i am in fact, a total fuckwit.
one day, she will probably read this and be filled with doubt that i actually care for her.
truth is, no matter what i say or do, no matter what happens, no matter where i am, despite pointless fights and despite the fact i didnt think about what i said...
i love her
forever&always&ever. nothing will change. and i will NEVER forget her. my plan is to always stay in contact. but i dont know what time will bring.
this is considerably long for a post. but i need to say everything.
how about the fact i dont like him anymore?
oh great, ive done it again.
he will return from his holiday thinking he is about to have a girlfriend
and then ill say "how was your holiday? by the way, im over you"
things arent looking up for the future.
so i will sit here, confessing my thoughts to no one.
x♥x
