Sunday, February 24, 2008
Thursday, February 7, 2008
feeling left behind.
i havent spoken to her in a while
although she told me she would be around
and now comes the time that we wont be able to talk at all.
its had for me to explain things...
...but let me put it like this
shes leaving me behind.
im happy that she is finally doing more constructive things with her time.
but i needed her to breathe.
and shes gone.
moving closer to home, we have a guy.
this guy once went insane when he had to spend mere hours away from me.
every night he would tell me how much he cared.
he would say those things he thought i wanted to hear.
and now, everything has just suddenly changed.
he doesnt speak to me.
he barely looks at me.
he doesnt even say hello.
all i get is "whats the answer to 6.g)?", and that wasnt even face to face.
then you have all those people i used to know.
the ones who live life happily, with all their friends, all their jokes, everything between.
and here i am.
i feel so...
i wont say the word.
although she told me she would be around
and now comes the time that we wont be able to talk at all.
its had for me to explain things...
...but let me put it like this
shes leaving me behind.
im happy that she is finally doing more constructive things with her time.
but i needed her to breathe.
and shes gone.
moving closer to home, we have a guy.
this guy once went insane when he had to spend mere hours away from me.
every night he would tell me how much he cared.
he would say those things he thought i wanted to hear.
and now, everything has just suddenly changed.
he doesnt speak to me.
he barely looks at me.
he doesnt even say hello.
all i get is "whats the answer to 6.g)?", and that wasnt even face to face.
then you have all those people i used to know.
the ones who live life happily, with all their friends, all their jokes, everything between.
and here i am.
i feel so...
i wont say the word.
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
love goes beyond this.
why does everything have to change?
dont get me wrong. some parts of me i wish to change.
but i miss all those 5am nights.
i miss laughing about the stupid things.
i miss the way you would make me cry, but not because you hurt me, because you helped me open up.
i miss how you trusted me with everything.
how you would say things without thinking of whether i would care or not.
now what replaces is ever long silences.
were never online anymore.
and when we are, we never talk.
i know youve moved on.
i dont want to believe that youve grown, and "gotten over" me.
i want everything back to how it was a few weeks ago, a few months ago.
theres two people that ive been talking about in here recently.
but i have failed to mention theres a third.
she always listens.
she always shares everything with me.
she makes me feel loved and wanted.
she cares. she asks. she knows when somethings wrong.
and i think ive decided to let her read these. maybe.
and if you are reading this... i can trust you not to tell anyone, right?
dont get me wrong. some parts of me i wish to change.
but i miss all those 5am nights.
i miss laughing about the stupid things.
i miss the way you would make me cry, but not because you hurt me, because you helped me open up.
i miss how you trusted me with everything.
how you would say things without thinking of whether i would care or not.
now what replaces is ever long silences.
were never online anymore.
and when we are, we never talk.
i know youve moved on.
i dont want to believe that youve grown, and "gotten over" me.
i want everything back to how it was a few weeks ago, a few months ago.
theres two people that ive been talking about in here recently.
but i have failed to mention theres a third.
she always listens.
she always shares everything with me.
she makes me feel loved and wanted.
she cares. she asks. she knows when somethings wrong.
and i think ive decided to let her read these. maybe.
and if you are reading this... i can trust you not to tell anyone, right?
im left here for dead.
not only do i think im losing one of you
but the other has changed so much.
shes so different.
i could talk to her about everything and she would do the same.
we would reassure each other.
we would remind each other "you are the most amazing person in the world".
we gave each other advice.
we shared our troubles.
our lusts.
our joys.
we would have bad days and reassure each other everything will get better.
but what happens when she gets better and moves on?
i told you i couldnt live without you. and now youre fading away.
but the other has changed so much.
shes so different.
i could talk to her about everything and she would do the same.
we would reassure each other.
we would remind each other "you are the most amazing person in the world".
we gave each other advice.
we shared our troubles.
our lusts.
our joys.
we would have bad days and reassure each other everything will get better.
but what happens when she gets better and moves on?
i told you i couldnt live without you. and now youre fading away.
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
update.
i dont even know what to type.
how about i think im losing you?
"[s]he just prefered to keep to [her]self. what was wrong with that? [s]he couldnt change the way [s]he was"
how about i think im losing you?
"[s]he just prefered to keep to [her]self. what was wrong with that? [s]he couldnt change the way [s]he was"
Friday, February 1, 2008
im sorry i ever tried.
tonight you made me feel terrible without even trying. litrally.
now i can imagine...what you could do to me if you tried.
youre growing popularity has forced you to push me aside.
im sorry i ever tried.
now i can imagine...what you could do to me if you tried.
youre growing popularity has forced you to push me aside.
im sorry i ever tried.
i feel...
... replaced. forgotten. everything between.
"im going now, im too bored."
"oh... okay, ttyl xx"
"[ such-and-such ] just logged on"
"ah. i see"
*pause*
"aren't you going?"
"nah, im staying now"
ughh. forgive my lack of explaining. but this is just ridiculous.
... you set me up to leave me ...
"im going now, im too bored."
"oh... okay, ttyl xx"
"[ such-and-such ] just logged on"
"ah. i see"
*pause*
"aren't you going?"
"nah, im staying now"
ughh. forgive my lack of explaining. but this is just ridiculous.
... you set me up to leave me ...
blow it all away
why cant you try harder?
my mind is constintly thinking.
so is yours, i know, but you have other things to worry about.
everything i post is wrong
but i dont have the guts to delete a single thing.
my mind is constintly thinking.
so is yours, i know, but you have other things to worry about.
everything i post is wrong
but i dont have the guts to delete a single thing.
put simply: pure jealousy
im getting tired of this.
cant you throw your lies at someone else.
you say you try so hard
but all im getting is a heap of laughing.
im not better. i know.
but i dont complain like you do.
i feel like im losing you.
but im the same boring person
i know youll realise sooner or later.
there are always people out there better than you
[ i know i should be proud, but ]
i hate always being second best to you.
i live in your shadow
but pretend everythings fine.
and i dont thin i could ever tell you otherwise.
ill never stop loving you
but one day youll stop loving me.
cant you throw your lies at someone else.
you say you try so hard
but all im getting is a heap of laughing.
im not better. i know.
but i dont complain like you do.
i feel like im losing you.
but im the same boring person
i know youll realise sooner or later.
there are always people out there better than you
[ i know i should be proud, but ]
i hate always being second best to you.
i live in your shadow
but pretend everythings fine.
and i dont thin i could ever tell you otherwise.
ill never stop loving you
but one day youll stop loving me.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)